They always say the greatest ideas hit you when you least expect it. For me, that occurred this morning on my drive to work. I don't have time to tell you much about it right now, but I'll try to get to it later today. Ladies and gentlemen (mostly gentlemen), I give you "hosurance".
The idea was mine, though Nick coined the catchy-sounding term after my original idea was just whore/slut insurance. Guys, if you date around enough you're going to get dumped sooner or later, probably for nothing at all. Or you may experience something similar to what I did, in which the entire relationship was a lie because I was being cheated on. I won't name any names, just see the picture a couple of posts below to identify the guilty party. This most recent experience gave me the idea for hosurance.
Let's say you're dating a girl and you treat her great. You take her on great dates, nice dinners, buy her gifts, etc. Then you break up thanks to something that trifling ho did. You're left not only without the girl now, but you're out of a lot of money you invested to get her and keep her happy. It's gone. This is where hosurance comes into play. If you had a hosurance policy, you simply add a new girlfriend's name on it when you start dating her, similar to the way you'd add a beneficiary to your life insurance policy. Then over the course of your relationship, you save all your receipts from the dinners, gifts, etc. If the relationship goes bad and she's the cause of it, you file a hosurance claim and turn in your receipts. Your policy covers you and you're reimbursed 100% of funds expended over the course of the relationship. Yes, you're still without the girl, but at least you got your money back thanks to the brilliance of hosurance!